Between today and last September 18, I would have to say that the steady outpouring of the rain and the constant thunder claps happening is what lead me to finally put into writing the message I heard from citichurch that sunday afternoon. It was somewhat unconventional for 7 different people to take 7 different pointers and share their thoughts about it.
Going to church doesn’t have to be boring. People think that doing so is traditional but I believe that whatever you feed yourself: thoughts, shows, friends, food, influence, ideas will make up for what comes out of you as a person.
Have you ever heard of someone who wishes they were born from another race? Secretly hoping to get out of the current rut, desperately seeking validations from “authorities” and “influencers” that makes up the glorious society they wish to be a part of? At one point, I was one of them. I needed to feel that for reasons of inadequacy. With the recent brawling and chaos and popcorn-drama going on in our philippine political arena, it is not a surprise that a lot of changes are happening in the country. Be it good or bad- depending on who has the say. It’s definite that people are “uncomfortable” at all sides.
We Filipinos love to partake. (If you’re a Filipino reading this don’t get offended). We always want to have a say on everything. That’s because we are so passionate. We have our causes to run, advocacies to pledge here and there and we say pieces of our mind (intentional or unintentional). Leading us to rant on facebook. And I just really have to be honest on this blog that whatever opinions I have does not reflect the entirety of my race. (This is somewhat the portion for me to disclaim. hihi) Albeit the truths that I see in the society I’m living in.
People tearing each other apart? We have a name for that – crab mentality. It’s so common that it makes me so sad to think that people who has this type of attitude can otherwise make so many other productive things to do in life rather that making it a mission to pull people down. I cannot speak for others but I believe this quality plays as a significant reason why the Philippines cannot be progressive as much as we want to be.
So what about the message?
I have outlined the 6 habits of Filipinos that won’t help make any difference. It spoke to me so deeply that I just had to share. In hopes that people who read this will turn towards self-examination and delve deeper into becoming better people. Simple as that.
Yes. There’s a big difference between being stingy and being frugal aka thrifty. Sure, we have to save and spend on things that matter to us. We Cebuanos have a trait- when we go out to dine, we want to eat something that it delicious and at the same time cheap (not affordable but cheap). We have to get the best deals or else we feel like we are being robbed but it doesn’t have to be that way. The thing is if you want quality time, quality products, quality food, quality life – you have to invest on them.
We are also stingy in our time, effort and compliments when we can be generous. If you don’t have money then you can be generous with a lot of other things. That will say a lot of things about you. I have this mantra everytime I go out shopping and I am carefully learning this discipline in all aspect: BUY LESS. CHOOSE WELL.
Have you come across a person where you feel like you’re walking on eggshells around them? You have to watch what you say to them, how you manipulate your terms or else the vase breaks and you will be at fault. Gladly, I have a small but strong inner circle of friends where we can tell each other things openly the way we can’t act around everyone else or we’ll be screwed. They say if there’s no sarcasm and shenanigans, there ain’t no friendship at all.
I can only point out to the social media circus. God, we are all over the place! First stop, with regards to #Duterte. One person says something and the other gets offended and the balls keeps rolling as to who we should put the blame into. It’s one thing after another. We fight and we get offended and then we retaliate. Two things. First, what other people say about you (or to other people for that matter) is none of your business. Let them have it- it’s their life and right. Because what they say tells more about themselves than the person they are referring to. Second, and I have to quote Sylvester McNutt on this one because what he said is just so good not to mention:
To counter this trait, we have to be overcomers. We have to get passed the pride and the notion to be always right. Accepting things as they are. It is okay to be sensitive and feel and see beauty in such a harsh world we are living in but you don’t have to dwell on that. Focus on what’s important.
Because who isn’t?But most of us are afraid of change and no matter how many times we say that change is coming, we still haven’t fully grasped change because our actions speaks louder in our behalf. We are scared to try out new things, new cuisine, new styles for the fear of being ridiculed or worse for the fear of not fitting in. We are scared of expanding our horizons and teaching ourselves new knowledge to broaden our understanding of the world and for what? why? Because we like to be kept in a safe and secured zone. That familiar, comfortable zone we couldn’t give up. There’s a lot to be said about this concept but it’s easily said than done. I have my fears too but despite of it all I wanted to have the decency to be brave. That, at least I owe to myself. To try despite the gripping fear I have everyday and everytime I try do something new.
I want to be a champion because we are more than conquerors. Jesus said so. And I believe in Him.
Maybe it comes along with the inferiority complex we feel. The feeling of not being enough. I don’t know. Maybe it’s just me. But more often than not, we wait for other people to decide things for us. We go with the group or the advertisement that says “choose this, be that, drink this” because that’s what everybody’s doing right? Even if it doesn’t sit well with us completely. The thing is we have to take a stand. When people say I’m weird because I’m too outspoken, I take that as a compliment. Not everyone has the boldness to stand for what he/she believes in. Most people would just give in – to pressure, peers, trends. I’m here to say you don’t have to. How we do anything is how we do everything. Remember that. Boldness is a superpower. Because God did not gave us the spirit of timidity, but that of power, love and self-discipline.
I hate it when my mother says we JUST have to eat buwad because (mag mantinir lang ta ani kada adlaw) mantinir = root word: maintain. Don’t get me wrong, I have no issues with buwad or any kind of fish for that matter. But my issue is with that crappy mentality that anything is already “good enough”. Many of us, would rather sit with what is just handed to them without even having to fight for it themselves. We are serious scientists in making things work out for good, but have we considered doing better? To strive for excellence in everything that we do? With the quality of our outputs, with what we post on our timelines, with harnessing the talents and skills because God knows he has endowed us with so much resources! We just don’t know how to maximize them.
Don’t settle for anything less than what you deserve. I implore you to live your lives BIG! Mediocrity equals characterless. And nobody changed the world by being common.