Dubai is known to house thousands of different nationalities coming and going. Not just the Arab people of the Middle East but all throughout the world.
April 3 2014 :Starting 2 days ago, its all about staring at empty walls, breathing deeply, trying to reorganize my routine and adjustments to coping up with nothingness. Everything I knew for the last five years has all finally come to an end. I have this lingering grip of reconciling the bittersweet feeling in my gut. Of having to let go of people. Perhaps, most of them see me as a person with no deep attachments, who has always kept her calm and sometimes looses them all at once and i have them confused about my personality at some point. Eitherway, they have grown inside of me so much its hard. When I arrived here in Dubai last September of 2008, I knew nothing about living outside the context of “Filipino” ways. I just came with an expectant heart that is open and willing to liberate oneself. I had my plans and as always, I had this notebook filled with enumerated points to tackle one day at a time ( I told myself). If you are acquainted to my ways, I’m a todo-list maker, a planner and an explorer by heart so everything new to my eyes would deliberately ignite a spark. At first, at what seemed to be a herculean task to get along with people from different nationality and gene pool, I was branded to be the girl with a dragon tattoo. In other words, fearless and sometimes smirky! All along meeting and collaborating with minds that works unlike mine was something I harnessed to tame all throughout these years. The way things work out around here is totally…. shall i say “ a mind game “. Dubai is known to house thousands of different nationalities coming and going. Not just the Arab people of the Middle East but all throughout the world. Nevertheless, on the brighter side of life, I could have never met a lot of different kinds people in my entire life have I not been here. As an explorer as I am, my fearlessness to try out new things had me open to discovery of a lot of things. It opened me to try out dishes I can’t even pronounce much more spell. It had me encountered people of strangely surprising interests, but most of all, it tested my strength and my ability to endure the most crucial stage in my life. I’ve learned how love works and how it could destroy a person if not used as a weapon to protect. It made me push myself to the limit and discover that limits are as good as you intend them to be. It kept me moving from one place to another. It’s like I got lost in the biggest jungle and the challenge is to find your way back home. Not everyone might believe me on this, considering that I had a lot of resentments, but my work experience was something I was proud of to accomplish and be a part of. A few people, knew how much I have taken it by heart to give the best that I can. But some things don’t map out the way you wanted to. And that’s a concrete fact in this life. No regrets there. But when your environment is more of a toxic contribution to your soul then you must learn how to save yourself and get out of there. It was a long-year struggle with myself whether to remain unhappy and stucked or become fearless and unrelenting again. Many of my pursuits, hail! 90% of my pursuits were definitions of failure at its best but I’m not ashamed of anyone of them. Not one bit, because it is my lifetime evidence and proof that I am persistent until the very end. Besides, a meaningful life is the one colored with drama, advocacy, disorders, struggles, and many more as opposed to a life lived with nothing but complacency and safety precautions. I, unfortunately do not want to cower on the latter part. Some have told me what a hasty decision I have made to drop everything else without a solid back-up plan in hand and they do have a point. However, my relentless soul is rallying so much I needed to listen to it. Life is a daring adventure or nothing at all. Needless to say with all my listed resolutions and step-by-step planning that has tumbled down the more I try to force it. I have come to a conclusion that “ VERY LITTLE IS NEEDED TO BE HAPPY”. Maybe, just maybe I have deluded myself too much with the illusion of doing everything. I know I can do anything …… but not everything. I realized that I had become the girl, who in her utmost wanting not to depend her happiness unto anyone has continually chased after every empty nothings despicably.
At first, at what seemed to be a herculean task to get along with people from different nationality and gene pool, I was branded to be the girl with a dragon tattoo.
I cannot deny that we started from scratch and thinking about how startled we were when we got assigned to different rooms with foreign strangers as roommates is like a mixture of vodka+ beer = total disaster. I remember how we used to gather together in one room and cook and eat and dread the days to come. Ohh, there was a lot of drama and i cringed at the thought of those memories. Of the childish heist and arguments we chose to entertain ourselves with.
My final truth : I wouldn’t have come acrossed so many kinds of people any other way. Learning a few tidbits and pieces of language from each country, the slang terms we try to awkwardly babble when trying to force our way into a customer’s understanding. It baffles me how people can travel so much and not bother to learn English. It’s like going out without underwears. But then again, I am slightly guilty for not bothering to learn the local language as well. So I guess, whatever floats your boat! One thing I will truly miss though is the diversity of race pool I get to meet inside the walls of GAP. Seriously, its like we’ve been train to do customer service that far exceeds our competitors and that’s how we get to the core of the tourists, travelers, locals, loyal VVIP customers and the like. The staff are so diverse that it is impossible not to befriend one person or two. With that realization, you understand that there’s more to life than the enigmatic Philippine animosity. There’s a big, vast world out there full of people and race and tribe that you know nothing about until they show up in front of you. And you understand where their thoughts, culture, belief comes from. What makes them a race, moreover, a person, a human being. Eventually, you unlearn, relearn, expose and expand your own horizon. People should not be categorized based on their backgrounds.
Solid Truth : there will always be someone who’s better, smarter, prettier than you. Period. The important question you must ask yourself is: ” Do you like who you are? ” ” Is this the life you want to live?” You dont have to be better than others. You just have to be better than the person you were before.
This movement I had carefully imposed on myself is what I shall call a road to rehabilitation. I’d like to bid a formal goodbye and closure to the 5 years I have allotted with dedication. It taught me the most important foundation in life – PATIENCE. Indeed, the virtue of patience comes by so hard you nearly have to kill yourself to master it. I will be forever grateful to consider this place a platform that took me to many destinations that then lead to incredible adventures. I am ultimately blessed that even with the reigning disquietness of my soul, God has truly emerged faithful in all my circumstance. To be honest, I dislike it when people say ” God loves you because you are special “. If everyone is special then we loose the definition of it altogether. God loves us for who He has created us to be. Solid Truth : there will always be someone who’s better, smarter, prettier than you. Period. The important question you must ask yourself is: ” Do you like who you are? ” ” Is this the life you want to live?” You dont have to be better than others. You just have to be better than the person you were before. If we only but allow God to be a part of our lives, in one or another, He will make everything bearable. I owe my parents all the honor for raising me to believe in Jesus. Because how else can I explain the reason why I’m still here. Its all by His grace definitely. In the famous lines of Robert Frost ” I have taken the road less traveled, and it has made all the difference. ” This road I’ve chosen might mean groping but I eventually learned that there’s only one thing you should work out your entire life and that is how to cultivate a peaceful heart. Do you have it?